A Headless Horse in My Bed

Dear Tante and Oma,

Remember in The Godfather when the producer refuses to cast Johnny Fontane in his new film, and Don Corleone sends a message? Well, last night Sabrina’s horsy pacie met a similar end, and the screaming was about the same.

Sabrina’s horsy wasn’t named Khartoum, but he was a handsome pink devil with an impish green pacie in his mouth. Last night Mama took a pair of scissors to him and murdered poor little horsy!

Here’s what happened: for a long time Mama and Daddy have been telling Sabrina that Easter is NO MORE PACIES DAY—even at nighttime!

This seems mean, because Sabrina sure loves her pacies. She has horsy pacie, doggy pacie, green froggy pacie, and beaded pacie chains from Germany with pacies on the end. She likes to sleep with about twelve pacies. She likes pacies on her fingers, pacies in her mouth, and pacies clipped to her shirt.

During the day she’ll go lie down just so she can have a pacie.

But Mama said it was time to sleep without pacies and Daddy said it was time to sleep without pacies and the dentist said it was time to sleep without pacies. I must admit my big sister is getting a bit of an overbite.

Anyway, Big Sisser Sabrina was very excited about Easter and about being a big girl who sleeps without pacies.

Until bedtime, that is.

Easter night she said she would just wear the pacies on her fingers, but somehow they found their way into her mouth. The next night Mama said “No pacies. Period.” Apparently saying punctuation makes it more convincing.

When the punctuation ended, the crying started.

Big Sisser Sabrina cried and cried when Mama said goodnight without pacies. Then she stood and screamed. Then she turned on all the lights and cried some more.

Daddy went up to help Sabrina. Sabrina stopped crying long enough to tell Daddy she wanted a pacie chain. Mama sent one up. Tricky Mama took the pacie off the pacie chain first, though.

You can imagine my sister’s reaction.

Then Mama went up to try to calm down Sisser Wisser. Sisser asked for horsy pacie. Mama said she couldn’t have a pacie with horsy. Sisser said, “OK.” Mama said, “You want horsy without a pacie?” Sisser said, “Yes.”

So Mama left the room, cut the pacie part off horsy, and brought the remains to Sabrina.

Well, you can’t imagine Sisser’s grief. Her beloved horsy had been decapitated. She cried. She wailed. She moaned. She screamed. She opened her mouth and no sound came out. She gnashed her teeth.

She calmed down some, and then took one look at her horsy and started sobbing again.

To make a long sob story short, Mama had to rock a hiccupping sister in the recliner and tell her stories about how Mama and Daddy had to learn to sleep without sucking on anything. After sister calmed down, she went back to bed. Then the crying started again.

I finally decided to sleep, but this morning Mama said it took my sister two hours to cry herself to sleep.

Today Sabrina has been walking around sadly asking Mama if we can put that pacie back on horsy. Mama said no.

Then she asks Mama why Mama hurt horsy. Mama calls it “an unfortunate misunderstanding.” Sisser calls it the “deliberate murder of a non-combatant.” Sabrina asked Mama if Linnie would have to give up her pacies some day too. Mama said yes.

Run for your life, Kitty Cat Pacie, run for your life!

Love,
Linnie Lou